moragmacpherson: (daring)
moragmacpherson ([personal profile] moragmacpherson) wrote2011-11-22 06:50 pm

You Have a Lot to Learn and I Hope You Never Learn It

As I often do when I'm totally unhappy with everything I write (and given that I've written more than forty pages of fic and thesis in that time, that's a whole lot of work to disown), I have turned to Hunter Thompson for inspiration.  I should know better than to do this, but he's the writer with whom I most personally identify. The well-worn free-associating paths of his thoughts echo my own, and he too celebrated those moments when writing came as a joy even as he admitted that the motions of writing for pay or on demand often made him feel like an old whore faking ecstatic screams.  To the customers it's all the same, and that is both a blessing and a vile miscarriage of justice.  I miss Hunter dearly and I think I may have finally forgiven him but he leads me to nihilism and that makes me unproductive. Also, it led me to start reading Mencken and now I feel kind of dirty for it.

But I do have some comfort.  He is 6'3" (you know I like 'em tall)  and he is a most capable champion as he has overcome not only time and space — but any objections.  Sometimes you look into the abyss and a pooka in the form of a giant rabbit looks back at you.  This is a good thing, a necessary thing, a beautiful thing.  Sometimes we need a reminder that there is more than one way to rid ourselves of the pain of being a man. 

I think Hunter would have approved of this coping mechanism.  After all, weird heroes and mould-breaking champions exist as living proof to those who need it that the tyranny of 'the rat race' is not yet final.